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1. Eyes Up

Set it off
Eyes up
Well God damn

2. Come Out Of Your Room

A deep breath I took
My lungs rattled
My hands shook
& like a furnace my face burned
Eyes lit
Vision unturned

Forgive my words
Forget me now
At my feet

On the floor lay a lifeless mess
In my chest
Beat a heart on the verge
Red about to break

You tried to die by the bed side
Please God why?
Answer me

The right goodbye
Would have come out wrong
At that point it was pointless anyway
Pain, hate, fear, loss, rage
They begin to swallow me

They begin to swallow me
All I wanted at the very moment
Was anything among
Answers or exit signs
& from that view I became you
To be the one desperate for escape

With your attempt at death
I make a point to live
I will now live

3. The Guilty Dog

Am I though I try
To look otherwise
Laugh or smile
Disguise or rather hide
The insecurities is it I feed
You ask
Why mask what the fuck is going on with me?

Why should you care?

& I remember thinking to myself
God if you're up there send me down someone
Who gives a fuck

It's hard living, it's hard times
In my mind
Doubt everything around me
Yet I say
You're not fine
I tell myself
You're not right

It's insane the things I wish that I had felt
Like the piercing sting of a father's belt
Because tough love is still love
Love's tough, I know this much
I'll tell you right now motherfucks life's harder when you got none
& yet still I try

They say the guilty dog barks first
& I've been barking till my fucking throat hurts

For many years I've tried
To escape what makes me, me
But all I wanted my whole life was for someone to give a fuck

4. Dropping Plates

I dread
Waking up in the morning
No time to breathe
This is my life
Nine through noon
Noon to night

I clock in
Seen as a servant
Every hour another nerve is hit
My rage boils deep behind my eyes
I smile while 'Please sir I apologize'
Somebody please get me
The fuck out of this place

Now think back to what you're working towards
Fuck this shit
Keep it together
Keep moving forward

So I keep my composure
Don't hesitate
I play the game though I feel
Like dropping plates

I tell myself that it's for the best
Collect tips & cash empty pay checks
From fucks who can't even remember
My name
One simple thing
I'm dropping plates

5. Balancing Survival And Happiness, Pt. I

In other people I've lost most faith
But who's to say I'm not viewed the same

Here's to me

I am in need
Because I want not need
Not feeding the hungry
No soothing relief
Now look down on me
I am the worst of these
Because I beg for more
Knowing other's need

Applaud me
I'll bow
As I pat my own back
For thinking good thoughts
Tilt your nose up
The balancing act

Hang my head as these problems
Scream out
You selfish fuck [2x]
Children cry
People die
Countries fight & all I
Do is think of myself

Such is human nature
I've lost my way

But I was given two hands to help too
Human rights
Drone strikes
Public lies
What can I do? [2x]

In other people I've lost most faith
But I'm trying to fix my mistakes

We're all balancing survival & happiness

6. A Quarter Up The Staircase, Pt. II


7. Ghost Pains, Pt. III

I think too much
To be accepted and not rejected
I am the outcome of an absent father
I am the product of a single mother

She hid her doubt
To keep my heart safe
I shut my mouth
Afraid hers might break
How do you
Even begin to tell
Your child he was never wanted

What did I do wrong?
How could you do wrong?
You did wrong

Quick to turn your back
Even though it made me feel like trash
My mother swore to me
"We'll be fine without him"
As she put me into my bed

& I watched her weep
The lullaby of a mother's cry
& undeserving of her pain

I now see why she lied to me

To ease my pain
Cause there wasn't fuck to say
Hush now
Whenever I would ask about you
Ask about you

Life's a bitch when you're a bastard
Jealous of love
I'd question my fucking self
My heartache continues everyday
So Father's Day stay the fuck away

This is our message to you
I know now that I shouldn't stay down
About you walking out
It's made me who I am
& I'm fine with it
I know now that I shouldn't stay down
About you walking out
So Romero Lanuza you can keep your life
No father or not
I will live my life without you


8. Blossom

Plastic flowers
On a cold level splay
Cigarettes lay sizzling
In your
Tarred ash tray

46 & always sick
My hopes
They were all gone
Vacuum lips & every bit of smoke
Is withdrawn

Get up [2x]

A rush of fire burns
I'm in its light
Choked up or chained down

& I burned with it
& I burned with you

Every time you coughed
I feared the very worst
Thinking you ate smoke
To cure your belly's thirst

Like loose change in a coffee can
Your throat it would burst
& I wanted better for you
Strangled your days were cursed

Charred lungs
& breath that smoldered
I just couldn't see it
Till I got older

You spoke through crackles
& you walked as if you were shackled
Slowly but surely
It got you too

& I just watched
I did nothing

9. Crown Of Books

9. Crown Of Books

One step forward two steps back
I've lived
To little to have lasted
This long
Face facts
Life's fast
Catch up
To what I ask
Your dreams?
Hear me

I'm no scholar
No touch
I'm no one with the locust
Who left his shell behind in search of second life

I'm not
What you had
Ever hoped for

I learned more from music
Than from any teacher or text book

But I never asked for that
I remember being young & all I wanted was to be beautiful in your eyes
But I've come to one fucking conclusion
There's no place for

The youth war is over but I don't know if I've
Won or lost
I'm no one with the locust
Who left his shell behind to live a life of sleepless nights
Sleepless nights

I'm not what you ever hoped for

10. Box Beneath The Bed

Why can't life be like the photos
Stored beneath the bed?
The joy of a moment
Forever frozen
Keeping us alive
Paper fortress
Who's sole
To remains & never change
But the people & places
They never stay the same

Time waits for no one
Why would it wait for me?

Losing my life
I'm chained to memories

Despite all the years passed
It won't change
If a picture's worth a thousand words
I can't stay quiet

Why can't life be like that thin moment
When everything made sense

Time waits for no one
Why would it wait for me?

Losing my life
I'm chained to memories

Thanks to a7x.b4mv.rox for sending these lyrics.
Thanks to nyegomes for sending track #3 lyrics.
Thanks to quentin.nourisson1 for sending tracks ## 7, 8 lyrics.

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