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1. Excelsior Mali Formidi

2. Rise

Is there a reason we're all down here together?
I feel the lowdown is that we're all too low down.
Why us? Why here? Why everything?
Mayhap, we should thrive a little higher.
So let's take a step...
One that's going up...
So we can ask the question...
Is it time to rise?
Maybe we should rise!
Who else will rise?
Should we think about it? Rise!
No let's just
Not ride this wave of apathy
Our peers have left us strict instructions
Why us? Why not? Why anything?
All I know is that it might seem like a good idea!

3. Space Dementia

"OK Swindon are we good for launch in...
KAPOW! Launch into the black sky!
Destination the meteorite
Pass the stars 'til the points turn to lines
A voyage. With me, myself and I
This journey could be a lie
Nonsense. We will be fine
I journey alone into space
My quest to find alien race
Ooooooooooh. Space!
No companion to fill this empty place
"I couldn't stand it any longer
I killed him and fed him down the inspection hatch
Now I am stuck. Adrift in space with a dead man
A man I murdered
He can't get at me as long as I stay awake
And I will remain awake!
I defy you! Do you hear me Whitaker? I defy you!"
My sister, I miss her, but she looks a lot like Lister
Computer, reboot her, get a moon gun
And mother-fuckin' shoot her
What's that there? I don't care.
Sat alone, with no cards, playing solitaire
Breathe cold air, fuel's spent yeah
Ich habe space dementia
Collapsed. The inner parts of my mind
The colours start to unwind
A rainbowverse I will climb, eating time
Alone. Cast into the night sky
A mutiny left to die
Freezing I head to the light, to collide
"It's eerily beautiful out here... Swindon?
Are you reading? I'm [coughs]
Wait. What's that?
Over there behind the ship is that?
Is that Galacticu..."

4. Galacticus

Your praise and Reverence
Lends to me sickness and bile
Your exultant cried
Leave me with nothing left not to revile
My unspoken desire
Is the baking of flesh
Behind innocent eyes
Grins my monster inside
Devourer of worlds
Frey Bentos
He eats all the world
Devourer of worlds
Fat Bastard
He eats all the world
The pub landlord calls time
But my purpose is not yet begun
Luring the victim inside
Smother and choke 'til they die
Proudly cut into her flesh
Met with a 7 year old vintage whine
The world it must decide if I AM I

5. Crabulon

Beware! Geneticists
With their craziness and hybrid monster fantisies
Beware! The things they do
They're geneticising monsters with geneticglue
Beware! It won't be too long
Before they splice some stuff and engineer a Crabulon
Beware! Mighty Crabulon
Here he scuttles left to right made from flutonium
March forth, crabuhoard killing humorns(?)
March forth, raise a claw for the crab lord - Crabulon!
Destroy! The humanoids
Fill their bellies full of nasty little crabuloids
Destroy! Their only sun
Harness the power put it in a laser gun
Destroy! It's claw vs hand
Their demise is the beginning of our master plan
Destroy! The human race
Perform a pincer movement crabukilling at great pace
Arise my mighty pink army
Scuttle left! Scuttle right! Attack!
"But doctor how did Crabulon come to be?"
"Well little Kraven, when a robot and a crustacean love each other very much he uses his hard drivve to impregnate the crustaceans eggs. However the process of robo-insemination is far too complex for the human mind!"
Too complex for the human mind, my brain hurts

6. Frankingstein's Mirror

Bring me the spine, bring me the brain
Fetch me a cubit of subclavian vein
Bring me the arms, bring me some hands
Fetch me a flagon of adrenal glands
Bring me the lungs, stretch me some skin
Fetch me a plan of the hepatic portal system
Bring me some guts, blood to preserve
Begin the pasting of fresh vagus nerve
Bring me the head, before it swells
Glue him intact, injecting the cells
Open the skylight, bring me the lightning
Fetch me the lightning, bring it to life
I am a god, I am his lord
The lightning strikes and he is born
And now I’ll sing this for a change
My genius will pave the way

I watch him drown a baby
This killing makes me stronger
I hear him stab a lady
This killing makes me stronger
I smell him burn a nursery
This killing makes me stronger
I feel him deep inside of me
This killing makes me stronger
Die, die, die, die, die, die, die
This killing makes me stronger
Kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, die
This killing makes me stronger
Death, die, kill, ow, kill, gore, die
This killing makes me stronger
Aagh, raagh, die
This killing makes me stronger

I’m still a god, I’m still his lord
And I will put him to the sword
And now I’ll sing this for a change
My genius has gone astray
Close all the windows, turn off the lighting
Turn down the lighting, turn off his life
Take off the head, it’s starting to smell
Bring me the spork to reharvest the cells
Rip out the guts, blood to preserve
Undo the pasting of fresh vegus nerve
Deflate the lungs, just bin the skin
Tear up the plan of the hepatic portal system
Cut off the arms, let’s eat the hands
Then down the flagon of adrenal glands
Let’s lose the spine but keep the brain
With the subclavian vein, we will try again

7. Book Of Doom

[Brother Pain's Reading]
"And there he goeth up hence to Bethel
And he is going in the way
And the young little youths have come out from the city
And scoff at him and say unto him
'Go up bald head, go up thy bald head'
He looketh behind him and see-eth them
And declareth them vile in the name of Jehova
And two bears came out of the forest
And rendeth them in two..."
And here's chapter 1
And I read the instructions
Scribed upon the page one of the tome
My mind it be doth wander
"Write in only red ink and then. Blah blah blah"
I skip past the instructions
They're dead boring, I scan the preface
I leaf straight to the action
No distraction for me, just
The Book of Doom
Now here's chapter 2
I ignite sacred candles
I cut into my arm with the quill
Then I plot your demise
As I write down your names here 1,2,3
Now your fate is secured
I have made your outlook look quite grim
What's this? Something is weird
In retrospect (and thinking about it) perhaps I should have paid some more attention to
The Books of Doom
"This book is property of John Romero."
"Balls where is it?"
"I Don't know, you had it!"
"Is that it?"
Now where's chapter 3?
Holy crap I have I lost it
I am sure I put it over there
That bit's really important
OH EFF! Where has it gone, where's it gone, gone, gone
I give up I can't find it
The Librarian will not be pleased
Plus my curse is quite ruined
With frustration I then bin
The Book of Doom
"Just a reminder that your book is overdue."

8. Dance Of The Cyclops

See the cyclops
See how he dances
And the gypsy
She is a dancing
And the cyclops
He is a dancing
With the gypsy
Dancing to Danzig
Why? Why? Why?
And the cyclops
Looks with his one eye
At the gypsy
She is still dancing
And the gypsy
Looks at the cyclops
He is dancing
With his shirt off
Why? Why? Why?
And the cyclops
Reaches his hand out
For the gypsy
Stumbles and misses
Bad depth perception
He should have tried harder
The gypsies don't care
As they are still dancing
And the gypsies
Dancing to Danzing
He's not there though
He's on the radio
And the cyclops
Dancing with fury
Dancing for cash
Why? Why? Why?
See how they dance?

9. End Level Boss

Kneel down
And benighted with sword
I am battle-born Nord
I like Fenrir and fjords
Feed me. The command fireball
Side scroll peons will fall
I make a dent in the thrall
Searching. Here we search in this chest
Look a chain mail vest
This heavy metal is best
I try, the key on the sword
The sword on the door
Key on rope and on door
Jump. Hit. Dodge. Hit
And now that I have bought my horse
I will ride my horse
I ride until I hit the shore
And then I ride some more
His weakness becomes clear to me
I have worked it out
I meet the boss I fight the boss
And then I kill the boss
And when you think he's dead
You realise he's not dead
Again I die this day
God I wished I'd saved

10. Flight Of The Dragons

Against the breeze
Flapping their leathery wings
Razory claws and sharp teeth
Fiery death they will bring
Breathing fire
Spewing hot lavarly heat
Smashing their food against trees
Eliminating enemies
See them fly – the flight of the dragons (Breathing their fire)
See them fly – the flight of the dragons (Nobody likes them)
See them fly – the flight of the dragons (Tearing down castles)
See them fly – the flight of the dragons (Flight of the Dragons)
The dragons flew away
We’d thought they’d gone away
They hadn’t gone away
They came back yesterday
Let’s tie the wench to a tree
Sacrifice virginity
Then maybe they will let us be
Here they fly
Ignoring our sweet offering
Instead crushing us randomly
Perhaps we should have a plan B

11. When Moses Goes Wrong

10 plagues on you will fall
Life water become blood
In vessels, of stone and them of wood
Then the reptiles will crawl
Abundant upon wall
Dust bleed the gnats and lice to cover all
Raven claw
We’ll rise again
Holy wars
Bow down to the pharaoh’s black hand
A billion putrid flies will swarm
Livestock will inherit disease
Warts and boils break forth in hot sun
A sickness born in fire
Then flood and thunder call
Foundations crumble all
And locusts shall cover face of earth
And darkness quilt the land
The first born from each man
Shall see no light, shall breathe no breath again

12. Enter The Knightmare

[Treguard’s advice:]
“Welcome brave dungeoneers
Many a peril lies beneath
Lord Fear has many spies
You’d better keep your wits about you
Choose your quest wisely
Don your helm and eye shield
Be valiant, be true, step forward”

We’ll don the Helm of Justice
Treguard points the way
Your destiny awaits for you
When you
Enter the Knightmare
Where am I? In a room, with Granitas
(Side step left)
Take the bread, eat the key, grab the knife
(Side step left)
You’re in a room, there’s a bomb, quick run!
(Side step left)
Goblin horn, Lillith’s scorn, Pickle cries
“Warning team. Life force critical!”
Enter the Knightmare
“Warning! Temporal disruption imminent.”
“Ooooh. Nasty…”

Kraven Morrdeth — Bass
Dr Rabid Hell — Guitars, Vocals (lead)
Brother Dimitri Pain — Guitars (lead)
Princess Luxury — Keyboards
Ringmaster Monty Blitzfist — Drums

Thanks to comeplaydying515 for sending these lyrics.

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