CHARLATAN LYRICS

1. Sevier County Killer

Yeeha

Stick shift grinding honky tonk and drunk
I found a boy that got destroyed into a skid mark
Just a beer can for a headstone that I put there every Sunday
Well it starts and ends in goddamn Sevier County
Where the reaper leaves a penny on your death bed made of coal dust
And your long lost friends who were just dying to fit in had finally turned a couple heads on the growling end of a shotgun

Yah! Get on its morning
High time someone told you North Star leads you to Shit Lake Salty
Whoa! Hold your horses
This lands impoverished by the Sevier Plague
Yippy ki yi yah yi yah yi yah yi yah!

Small town with a killer on the loose that has ripe picking in the youth
So keep your doors locked
Got your wheel chair ridden uncle and the milk man's little brother
No one dares to say just as to why they stay but if you can make a friend of death maybe the dance will be a two step
Go ahead and run but don't be bothered by the scuffle at the door because remember
Sevier County's got your number

Yah! Get on its morning
High time someone told you North Star leads you to Shit Lake Salty
Whoa! Hold your horses
This lands impoverished by the Sevier Plague
Yippy ki yi yah yi yah yi yah yi yah!

Yah! Get on its morning
High time someone told you North Star leads you to Shit Lake Salty
Whoa! Hold your horses
This lands impoverished by the Sevier Plague
Yippy ki yi yah yi yah yi yah yi yah!

Don't go walking after midnight by the moonlight if you're searching for me
Don't go walking after midnight by the moonlight if you're searching for me

Yah! Get on its morning
High time someone told you North Star leads you to Shit Lake Salty
Whoa! Hold your horses
This lands impoverished by the Sevier Plague
Yippy ki yi yah yi yah yi yah yi yah!

Yah! Get on its morning
High time someone told you North Star leads you to Shit Lake Salty
Whoa! Hold your horses
This lands impoverished by the Sevier Plague
Yippy ki yi yah yi yah yi yah yi yah!

2. Bag Of Tricks

They
Can you tell me who they are
We
We all want to be they
Now they is a word that separates a conscience choice from consequence
Now we all hate to lose but love to hate the winner

Let's call it what it is
I'm your used up bag of tricks
Open up and take your pick
What's mine is yours

Hello world!
Does my sarcasm reflect the honest way that you felt
Are you laughing with or at me now
Hello world!
Can you typecast me a layman
Don't just want to be famous
Want to be nothing famous

They
Can you tell me who they are
We
They are one in the same (one in the same)
Why show my bones unless they're cast and turned to gold
And even then what is it worth unless there's bird shit on the statues of me

Let's call it what it is
I'm your used up bag of tricks
Open up and take your pick
What's mine is yours

Hello world!
Does my sarcasm reflect the honest way that you felt
Are you laughing with or at me now
Hello world!
Can you typecast me a layman
Don't just want to be famous
Want to be nothing famous

Laughing at me because I am different
Well I'm laughing at you cuz you're all the same

Hello world!
Does my sarcasm reflect the honest way that you felt
Are you laughing with or at me now
Hello world!
Can you typecast me a layman
Don't just want to be famous
Want nothing to be famous

Hello world!
Is my pathetic attempt to delight and impress you
All while laughing at you come on!
Hello world!
Can you typecast me a layman
Don't just want to be famous
Want nothing to be famous

Hello world!
Does my sarcasm reflect the honest way that you felt
Are you laughing with or at me now
Hello world!
Can you typecast me a layman
Don't just want to be famous
Want nothing to be famous

3. Cvn't Destroy Her

Crow bars bricks hammers for the ladies
Dead kitties go 2 for 1 today
Fine dining tastes a lot like shit
When you eat out of a dumpster
After all its Thanksgiving
Foundation on your eyelids
Costume parties cuz your room is such a mess
I'm vengeance I'm nighttime na na na na na na na na Batman

I'll write a song for you
And how you make me feel
I'll sing it every time I kiss you
You will hear the words

This is why guns kill
This is why guns kill
Ain't it people
Now we're equal
This is why guns kill
This is why guns kill
Ain't it people
Pop culture hero

Bitch face tits arms at the ready
Bloody gums have you flossed your teeth today
Morse code on her bed post reads
I first got lucky on my daddy daughter date
Nice ink kid where'd you get it
Needles brought to you by Freddy Mercury
I wrote my name down but I forgot...oh fuck!

You'll love soon enough
I'll write so many hits
And everyone will have this chorus
Sing it with me kids

This is why guns kill
This is why guns kill
Ain't it people
Now we're equal
This is why guns kill
This is why guns kill
Ain't it people
Pop culture hero

My fridge has created a martyr
Tragic overdose on gummy vitamins
Read the mirror to the right if you lived half speed
Or you might lose your legs much faster than you think
What's the plan Stan
Hari-Kari
I'd spill my guts but I lack integrity
Milky still birth starchy prolapse rumpled foreskin
Beg your pardon? Sir by all accounts systems are down

I'm sorry for your loss
I'll keep you in my prayers
140 characters
Flag eggplant poop dog winky face

This is why guns kill
This is why guns kill
Ain't it people
Now we're equal
This is why guns kill
This is why guns kill
Ain't it people
Pop culture hero

This is why guns kill people
This is why guns kill people
This is why guns kill people
This is why guns kill people

4. Instant Cult Classic

Well here it is
Something soft something sensitive
Kind of catchy catch my drift
You caught me breaking the fourth wall
Writing on the wall ain't it edgy
Play it in reverse you might hear me say fuck subliminally

Oh I can't forget that we've been falling in love
Oh isn't forget that without you I am nothing but a sad sick sadist
Baby play this when your heart hurts
Hunny forget money all I want is your blood

Ziggy can you hear me
Will there be racism on Mars

In all seriousness
I'd set joking aside in the chorus
If this song meant the world to you
I don't care what I say
Or what the music plays
Our little cult of two
My friend just you and I...

Well now you're soft smooth moist I know you hate that word
But it kind of turns you on like a Fight Club reference
Your love is my property
Cruel life cruel world Cruella de Vil
This part is for you and you alone now make it brutal

Real original my voice and you hate it
But just wait till you find out that this next part's copied and pasted
I am nothing but a sad sick sadist
Baby play this when your heart hurts
Hunny forget money all I want I'd your blood

In all seriousness
I'd set joking aside in the chorus
If this song meant the world to you
I don't care what I say
Or what the music plays
Our little cult of two
My friend just you and I...

In all seriousness
I'd set joking aside in the chorus
If this song meant the world to you
I don't care what I say
Or what the music plays
Our little cult of two
My friend just you and I...

Simon says seel your shit leave your family
Simon says be what you want cuz that's what Simon says
Simon says you want this
Simon says tell your friends
Drink the Kool Aid
You're out I didn't say Simon says

Now you're out dead wasted threw it all away
All because you took what I said too seriously
Now you hate me no one even noticed you were missing
All because you chose to hear and didn't choose to listen
All because you chose to hear and didn't choose to listen

In all seriousness
I'd set joking aside in the chorus
If this song meant the world to you
I don't care what I say
Or what the music plays
Our little cult of two
My friend just you and I...

In all seriousness
I'd set joking aside in the chorus
If this song meant the world to you
I don't care what I say
Or what the music plays
Our little cult of two
My friend just you and I...

If you don't like this song then fuck you
Don't slip and gag on the dicks on your way to hell

5. Ray Gun

In the time of molevolestation extererotic teresturbulation
Between galaxies wrought with contentions
By the power that be's abstainexistance

Quinnioche Ray-Gun the master of the lazerotic scum
Teresticular advantage no Scoob he can't outgun
Until he met Finelatia Tooth's prophylactary defense
He tried to draw on her his ray gun and blasted on his leg
Leg leg leg

Let's do battle enemate
Let's do battle in the rain
Let's do battle
Can you take me in front of these creatures
They're willing to pay

There's just some problems a ray gun can't fix
There's just some problems a ray gun can't fix
There's just some problems a ray gun can't fix
There's just some problems there's just some problems there's just some problems

Finelatia Tooth a prostosapian by trade
Was unimpressed when she saw Quinnioche's sploogered leg
Clean your gnarb she said this duel isn't over yet
The only way to beat this harlotreck is choke me with your love

Let's do battle enemate
Let's do battle in the rain
Let's do battle
Can you take me in front of these creatures
They're willing to pay

Brain meets vagasm
Ten paces Quinnioche suffers from premature ray gun ejactospasms

If there's a Grod,'Latia Tooth finally showed me
The unadvarse knows no end to my glory
Galaximized I just dare them to stop us
They'll be ejizzmulated by our bukaucus

There's just some problems a ray gun can't fix
There's just some problems a ray gun can't fix
There's just some problems a ray gun can't fix
There's just some problems

Let's do battle enemate
Let's do battle in the rain
Let's do battle
Can you take me in front of these creatures
They're willing to pay

Brain meets vagasm
Ten paces Quinnioche suffers from premature ray gun ejactospasms

There's just some problems a ray gun can't fix
There's just some problems

6. The Sick Nasty

We're just a bunch of fucking perverts are you nervous
Do you think would it hurt you if I snuck a little kiss
We're just a filthy god damn dog pile
Nothing wrong with how my love can manifest itself inside regret

We're in love
We're in love and it sucks
We're in love
We're in love
We're in love
We're in love and it sucks
We're in love
We're in love

What do you want me to say? It was fun
You know me I'll try anything once
If being happy is gay I'm queer as fuck
And I mean it mean it

Something's wrong I can feel the way she breathes a little deeper
Dirty mouth but she tries to keep her fingers to herself
Strangers just looking for some strange love is so mundane
The taste of your camel cigarette is cherry free

We're in love
We're in love and it sucks
We're in love
We're in love
We're in love
We're in love and it sucks
We're in love
We're in love

What do you want me to say? It was fun
You know me I'll try anything once
If being happy is gay I'm queer as fuck
And I mean it mean it

Are you alone Mr Boogie Man
Is that your name she's screaming
I'm not too old to check under my bed
I caught you peeking sneaky

We're not gay but we want to be
We're not gay gay but we want to be
Gay were not gay we're not gay
I'm not gay I'm in love

We're in love
We're in love and it sucks
We're in love
We're in love
We're in love
We're in love and it sucks
We're in love
We're in love

What do you want me to say? It was fun
You know me I'll try anything once
If being happy is gay I'm queer as fuck
And I mean it mean it

We're in love
We're in love and it sucks
We're in love
We're in love
We're in love
We're in love and it sucks
We're in love
We're in love
We're in love

7. Slavior

Dear god thou never asketh how I'm doing first
This child thinks that maybe that's not what I deserve
Now I've been meeting up with Lucifer at forks in the road
He says he'll teach me guitar if I just give him my soul
He says hell teach me guitar if I just give him my soul
He says hell teach me

Fake your faith and kill your dreams
You slave you save yourself for Jesus
Make shift maker thank me later
Make sure I get what I paid for

Now I've been faithful all these years you know I'm never sinning
I even let you use my gun at the abortion clinics
I know you says that its the meek that shall inherit the earth
But every time I turn my cheek you slam my dick in the dirt

Fake your faith and kill your dreams
You slave you save yourself for Jesus
Make shift maker thank me later
Make sure I get what I paid for

(Save yourself for Jesus, save yourself for Jesus)

Maybe things would be different if Jesus was a daughter
She'd be making love to Judas just to get back at her father
With a wet t shirt baptism and a sexy thorn tiara
Make a sacrament a Jack and Coke
In Jesus' name I party amen

Maybe things would be different if Jesus was a daughter
She'd be making love to Judas just to get back at her father
With a wet t shirt baptism and a sexy thorn tiara
Make a sacrament a Jack and Coke
In Jesus' name I party amen

Fake your faith and kill your dreams
You slave you save yourself for Jesus
Make shift maker thank me later
Make sure I get what I paid for

(Fake your faith and kill your dreams, you slave you save yourself for Jesus)

8. Great White Buffalo

Pinch me
I must be dreaming cuz I'll never die
List me
I don't think I won't make it out tonight
I like black lucky number seven
I give a moment out of every second
I like dancing if you do too
I think I touch myself at the thought of it oh

All right all right let's party
Peay up be somebody
Friday eve and everybody's saying
Grow up make me
All right all right you made it
Last call but I'm glad you came
Oh my god I want to hear you say it one more time all day all day

It ain't not terrible to wait I want to feel alive
I think its time one more shot before we say goodbye
I want to thank you for your company
I'm really sorry but I gotta leave
I throw my peace up one foot out the door
I've gotta ramble...fuck it one more

All right all right let's party
Peay up be somebody
Friday eve and everybody's saying
Grow up make me
All right all right you made it
Last call but I'm glad you came
Oh my god I want to hear you say it one more time all day all day

All right all right let's party
Peay up be somebody
Friday eve and everybody's saying
Grow up make me
All right all right you made it
Last call but I'm glad you came
Oh my god I want to hear you say it one more time all day all day

All right all right let's party
Peay up be somebody
Friday eve and everybody's saying
Grow up make me
All right all right you made it
Last call but I'm glad you came
Oh my god I want to hear you say it one more time all day all day

"Open up its the police shits getting way too outta hand this party is over hold up this is the best party"

We're gonna drink til its over
We're gonna dance to songs only we know
Rip off our sleeves show the ink's absolution
Love from the freak at the Dance Evolution
This ones for the life of the party

All right all right let's party
Peay up be somebody
Friday eve and everybody's saying
Grow up make me
All right all right you made it
Last call but I'm glad you came
Oh my god I want to hear you say it one more time all day all day

All right all right let's party
Peay up be somebody
Friday eve and everybody's saying
Grow up make me
All right all right you made it
Last call but I'm glad you came
Oh my god I want to hear you say it one more time all day all day

We're gonna drink til its over
We're gonna dance to songs only we know
Rip off our sleeves show the ink's absolution
Love from the freak at the Dance Evolution
This ones for the life of the party

9. China

There's things I can't explain
I need some time to try to define my ambiguity
I've never been sure; I'm good at ignoring

You promised I could stay
Why would you waste your time on me
What would your mother say
She never liked me anyway

I've been scared of the dark can you leave me the light on
Are you scared I sleep better alone

There's things I could have been
Sober honest a better friend
Of all the things I've ever said I miss you isn't what I meant

Well I guess this stop is me
Unless you have something more to say
I'll see your yesterdays
When you could smile and I could change

I've been scared of the dark can you leave me the light on
Are you scared I sleep better alone
I've been scared of the dark can you leave me the light on
Are you scared I sleep better alone

(I sleep better alone I sleep better alone)

All my something's are made up of nothing
All my nothing's are something's that I once believed
Be it small I find this reassuring
Nothing gained is a venture I think we've achieved
All my something's are made up of nothing
All my nothings are something's that I once believed
Be it small I find this reassuring
Nothing gained is a venture I think we've achieved

I've been scared of the dark can you leave me the light on
Are you scared I sleep better alone
I've been scared of the dark can you leave me the light on
Are you scared I sleep better alone

All my something's are made up of nothing
All my nothing's are something's that I once believed
Be it small I find this reassuring
Nothing gained is a venture I think we've achieved
All my something's are made up of nothing
All my nothings are something's that I once believed
Be it small I find this reassuring
Nothing gained is a venture I think we've achieved

10. Remarkable

What a day for a walk
Like my hair cut it off
Grab somebody you love and tell them fuck you
Its a beautiful life
Just be happy and smile
If it doesn't go right you get to die too

I just want to be me
I just want to be dumb
And be boring somewhere to someone
I just want to be clean
I just want to be burned
I just want to buy the happiness I didn't earn

We were saving the best part for the end
I was saving the best part of myself but I'm afraid I lost it

Put some prep in your step
Put some hump in your jump
Put some cock in your...CUT
THAT'S A SIN YOU FUCK
Feel the sun on your face
Its the warmth of God's grace
To remind you of free will to butt rape

I just want to be him
I just want to be God
Paint with hues of violence on canvas
I just wanna be home
I just want to be
Papa I love you but I got shit to do

We were saving the best part for the end
I was saving the best part of myself but I'm afraid I lost it
We were saving the best part for the end
I was saving the best part of myself but I'm afraid I lost it

(I'm afraid I lost it lost it lost it)
(I'm afraid I lost it)

Life is a circus
I'm damn near perfect
You will be sorted priceless to worthless
Fire and bee stings sex tapes and lynchings
These are a few of my favorite things

We were saving the best part for the end
I was saving the best part of myself but I'm afraid I lost it
We were saving the best part for the end
I was saving the best part of myself but I'm afraid I lost it

(I'm afraid I lost it I'm afraid I lost)

If you're happy and you know it then you're bad
If you're happy and you know it then you're bad
If you're happy then your ? will surely grow it
If you're happy and you know it then you're bad
Use your hands







CHARLATAN LYRICS